When should you close your business? Samantha Wills’ memoir dives into her decision

Samantha Wills made headlines with her decision to close her hugely successful jewellery brand in 2018. Her new memoir, Of Gold and Dust, covers that decision, walking readers through her thought process at the time.

This exclusive extract for SmartCompany Plus lets you jump inside her mind at the moment the decision was made.

‘My name is Samantha, and I signed up for this week because. . . I’m so sorry,’ was all I could say, as I looked down and tears fell into my lap.

‘It’s okay,’ Jill said, kindly and calmly. ‘This week, we all show up exactly where we are, you are supported in here.’ She gave me a small smile, her eyes kind and then she carried on with the class.

I was so embarrassed but no one in the class batted an eyelid, they just offered warmth and empathy. I couldn’t help but feel I was ruining the class for everyone and we were only a few minutes in. I was utterly broken. A complete mess, but for all the beauty that Omega held, I rationalised that it had seen a lot of mess. It’s the type of place people go to heal or deeply cleanse, neither of which were pretty processes. The fragmented pieces within me started to dance a little quicker. Being at Omega had given the deep rumblings a space to erupt; a space to finally unravel.

On the third night of the workshop, I turned on my phone after dinner to check my emails as I was walking back to my cabin. I waved my phone above my head as I walked — no doubt looking as crazy as I felt — trying to catch some of the elusive campus mobile phone service. When I saw emails start to filter into my inbox, I immediately stopped walking to take advantage of the pocket of good reception.

Over the years, Geoff and I had developed a practice where we would send each other what we called ‘observational emails’ every quarter. These emails had nothing to do with numbers or the P&L; rather, they were about company culture and things we observed within the company, hence their name. I had known I would receive this quarter’s email from him while I was away at Omega, but I couldn’t have predicted that this particular email, among the thousands of emails that Geoff had sent me over the past decade, would set off a course of ultimately life-changing events.

FROM: Geoff Bainbridge

TO: Samantha Wills

SUBJECT: Business at a crossroads

Hi SW,

I understand you are upstate this week and I respect you are taking some much-needed time and space both professionally and personally.

As you know, I was hesitant to send this email to you this week, but as per your request, please find my observational thoughts below.

I’m increasingly concerned about the future of the Samantha Wills jewellery brand and feel that it is very much at a crossroads. Our journey thus far has been special, but our future has never been more uncertain.

From my perspective, it comes down to brand ownership/leadership. While the Samantha Wills business is functioning well, the Samantha Wills brand has stalled and our leadership team is lost in their decision-making framework due to conflicts between Samantha Wills the brand and Samantha Wills the person.

Our success has largely come through building a team to support your brand vision, but increasingly this vision is not widely understood. My role in this partnership is to fulfil your vision but even I am confused about what this is (and I think you would agree that you are even struggling to see it yourself) and thus I am now just running the business to the P&L in the absence of a higher cause or purpose — something I never anticipated would happen.

This is a brand and a business that is crying out for purpose and passion; a consumer who wants to feel valued and loved; a team that wants to feel connected. Ultimately this is your business, your brand, your team and your story.

The time has come when we need to make some hard decisions:

• Given the lack of success we have had in trying to find a head designer to replace you, are you willing to return to Australia to effectively step back into running the company from HQ with appropriate creative support?
• I recognise that the scope of product we produce is significant: how do you feel about handing parts of this over to a larger design team who would work under your vision? Do you think you would be able to hand this creative control over while actively working in the business?
• I have learnt that pain is an important part of anyone’s journey and I respect that right now you are experiencing a very painful time. Given this, are you mentally and emotionally able to commit to this?
• If not, what are you able to commit to?
• If you choose not to step into an active role for the next growth phase of the business, are you prepared to watch a steady decline in the business over the coming years? I ask this given how personal the brand and the journey is to you.

One thing I have learnt and may be able to provide as advice is that pain is always difficult, but it’s okay and a natural process we all must go through to grow. The good news is, it doesn’t last forever, we will always be different on the other side and, if harnessed correctly, it builds resilience and not fear, courage and not resentment.

Of course, no decision needs to be made in haste but given your week away I felt that you may wish to factor some of the above into your thinking (but as I mentioned, I was equally nervous sending it to you at this time because I am very aware of what you are processing personally).

GB

I felt deeply the support in his words and appreciated his generosity in wanting to build a business around what I was prepared to commit to for the brand. I glanced up after I finished reading his email, and a moment of sheer surrealness washed over me when I noticed where I was physically standing. The path I was taking back to my cabin split in two and I had stopped right at a crossroads. The path to my left was the main road that wove around the entire campus. It was tarred with asphalt and you knew exactly where it would take you. The road that went to the right was not a road at all; it was a thin, winding path leading into a section of trees and ferns, and beyond that a flower garden.

I looked back down at my phone. ‘Business at a crossroads’ was indeed the subject line of the email. I looked at the crossroads I was standing at, the symbolism so significant in that moment that I couldn’t separate the physical from the metaphorical. My skin prickled with goosebumps and, in that instant, I just knew. I put my hand on my heart and heard the quietest, calmest of voices say, It’s time to close. It was the clearest thing I have ever experienced. It was as though I actually felt the words being spoken.

This is an extract from Samantha Wills’ Of Gold and Dust, Memoir of a creative life, published by Allen & Unwin, and available here.