How do I manage people who gossip?

Imagine being a newly appointed office manager, who finds that a couple of staff members are gossiping during working hours. They are mature age, and often make others uncomfortable by whispering, then stopping when someone approaches. I have been told about this problem and asked for suggestions on how to approach the issue in a positive constructive way, rather than having to “reprimand” like a schoolteacher.

I would try these strategies:

1. Create team ground rules for shared behaviours
Have a team meeting and set up team “ground rules” or agreed behaviours that everyone commits to. Start the session off by explaining that high performing teams have agreed standards of behaviour and performance and this can cover meeting punctuality, house-keeping and tidiness, use of shared resources, how to give feedback, lunch and smoking break etiquette, etc.

Ask for suggestions from the group as to what they would like to include. Someone could take notes on a whiteboard. Make sure that if no one has added something about the “gossip” issue that you add your own request into the mix. Ask that everyone show respect for each other and have open communication, where they speak directly to people, not whispering behind their backs if there are issues. And when the list is complete and streamlined, ask the group to agree to these. Ask someone to type up the list and put the list in a place you all share (eg. photocopy area, tea room, etc) and refresh and update the list every six months. Make sure you give the list to new people during their induction.

2. Give feedback
You do need to take individuals aside who are not performing or whose behaviour affects the performance of others. Be very specific about the behaviour – eg. if you are seeing and hearing disruptive whispering and giggling, describe what you see, what is heard and how it affects others.

Explain, saying something like: “You may not be aware of how visible it is when you do this”. Ask if they are aware that the behaviour can have a negative impact and be hurtful for those around them who may or may not be the target but feel it. This can be best done after you have set up some agreed ground rules because you can refer to them. Remember – ALWAYS give positive feedback at same time as “constructive criticism”.

3. Reinforce feedback and ground rules
If the behaviour continues – give feedback again; say you feel personally disappointed and upset because it creates a bad feeling in the team. Restate and agree again to respect each other and the ground rules.

4. Maintain leadership control and direction
It is critical that you take some kind of remedial action, especially if your feedback is ignored. You may need to give a written warning about the “disruptive” or unacceptable behaviour – but you must be specific about the behaviour itself and why it is affecting work performance of others. You must spell out what will happen if the person continues. It is a form of bullying so you need to spell out a zero tolerance policy and the consequences for anyone involved. There isn’t room here to worry about being perceived as a schoolteacher. If you do not take action with this kind of bad behaviour two things happen: it goes on and on and continues to disrupt others, and secondly, the other staff will lose respect for you because you are not handling it professionally and effectively.

5. Offer goals and rewards
Give clear goals and acknowledge good performance. Everyone loves recognition and hopefully the gossipers do some things for which they can be positively acknowledged.

6. Make the workplace motivating
Have a session with your group – at a different time – to get suggestions on what can make your workplace (the physical environment) more motivating and what can make the work and processes more motivating. Brainstorm ideas with your team, select some that are practical and implement them.

7. Ask for help
Find a good mentor, who is experienced with dealing with difficult staff. Ask how they would handle the same situation. Discuss how you are going with managing the problem. Maybe your own manager can be helpful, but it can also be a good idea to find someone outside the situation. There may be someone in HR that you can ask for advice from.

8. Implement communication skills training for the team
It would be very helpful to have the whole team do some team building and training in skills like how to give and receive feedback. This will enable them to give feedback directly rather than having to always involve the manager. It will help promote and deliver open communication.

9. Hold regular performance and career discussions
It’s important that managers have regular one-on-one discussions with their staff, ideally every month, about how they are going, and finding out if they are needing more challenges, alternative projects, different seating arrangements – or anything that helps them work more productively, or gain skills for their career and future.

Great managers tend to nip these kinds of problems in the bud. So make sure you don’t let a problem like this continue.

View Recognition & Feedback

Eve Ash is co-author of Rewrite Your Relationships (Penguin) and the producer of several best selling DVDs- including Recognition & Feedback, Open Communication & Teamwork and co-producer of Feedback Solutions, www.7dimensions.com.au.