Coping in harsh times: part 2

When we least expect it we may feel overwhelmed by a problem or a tragedy. And we just have to cope or learn to cope.

Maybe you have just been told you have a disease that is not easily cured, or you have been robbed and lost a computer with all your work; maybe you have lost someone close to you, maybe a job loss or a major financial crisis…

Last week I suggested these strategies:

1. Take control of your thinking patterns
2. Focus on health and physical wellbeing
3. Acknowledge and manage your feelings

Let’s go through some more strategies to help you cope with anything from a major tragedy or disaster to a challenge or problem that gives you sleepless nights.

4. Talk to someone – you are not alone

Life takes many twists and turns. See this time as one of your life turning points. No matter how bad you feel you are not alone.

Talk to a friend, boss or a counsellor – someone with empathy. Maybe find a group or network that will be helpful for this period in your life. It’s important not to stay alone and closed off.

5. Clean up and make changes

Often a tough time will push us to have to make changes anyway. Don’t fight the change, there’s no point – accept it quickly and start sorting out your physical situation.

There is evidence that when you get one aspect of your life into control, it has a generalising impact on the rest of your life. Clean up your office, your desk, maybe do a major throw out of old paperwork, recreate and tidy up filing system (physical and electronic), and do the clearing of old stuff not needed.
Maybe a clean up at home is needed… it can make you feel clear.

Make a fresh start on something. Do something new, or try a new way of doing something old.

6. Plan and prioritise

This is good at any time but especially now. Work out what must be done.

Review what you do have in life and make realistic plans. Set positive expectations and FOCUS on what you want – not what others want. Focus on what you can do now that you can control, and not get stuck on what is beyond your control and remaining stuck on what is out of your control.

Choose who to talk to – positive people, good planners, those who are managing, and focus on the benefits ahead.

7. Enjoy challenges – your own and others’

See and grab the opportunity to learn and develop and experience new feelings.

DIVE INTO WORK – make it a passion to do your work brilliantly.

Do something kind or special to support or help someone else.

Review your habits – work out what you can do to improve.

8. Visit a different place – be different

Whenever we step away and get out into a refreshing environment we remember how good it can make us feel and we say we must do this more often. Try a trip to the mountains, beach, desert, forest, park and enjoy nature. Even just a day trip can give you a refreshed feeling.

Spend time with new people… maybe even a support group.
Allow yourself to “reboot”.

Please write in any additional suggestions you might have found helpful.

Eve Ash is co-author of REWRITE YOUR LIFE! and REWRITE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS! and has created many DVDs to help people manage change (www.7dimensions.com.au).