They are bitching about me in the office. Help!

Dear Aunty B,

I’m a partner of a firm and I recently saw an email between a staff member and manager bitching about me.

One of the females said she wished I would leave and he responded, ‘don’t worry leave it to me, it’s what I do best’.

How should I address this situation?

Kind Regards

Dear Kind Regards,

Look, I was about to tell you to ignore it when I noticed that you are the boss! So that’s easy.

First you call in the female staff member. You hand her the email and ask this question in a professional way: “You wrote this?”

Once she confirms she wrote it, then ask her why she wrote it.

At the end of the very quick discussion, tell her that you work in a positive cultural environment and next time she should come and see you with a problem rather than send emails like this. Remind her that you are all working towards common goals. Tell her this is the end of the matter and leave it at that. Don’t forget that most staff members wish at some point through the average week that their boss would disappear in a puff of smoke.

Then call in the manager and present him with the email. Call him on it. Ask him why he would write such an email? Tell him that you find it very concerning that what he “does best” is not managing or strategy but undermining his superiors. Ask him for an explanation. Even if it is a satisfactory explanation let him know that you will be including this email in his performance review. Explain your culture and the negative effects of a bitchy, backstabbing environment on the business.

Whatever you do, don’t encourage their bitching and don’t get emotional. Stay focused on the big picture: what are you all doing to make sure the firm meets its targets?

Then after those meetings go and get a coffee and have a big think. Do you have a bitchy culture? Are you contributing in any way? (Exactly how did you get that email?)

Was there anything in those conversations with the manager and the staff member that you can take on board to improve relations in the office?

Be smart,

Your Aunty B

Aunty B is kicking back on holiday, but her advice is timeless, as evidenced by this Aunty B classic from April 2010. To read more Aunty B advice, click here.

Email your questions, problems and issues to auntyb@smartcompany.com.au.