At this stage, I guess I wasn’t even sure that everyone did really hate me. Was I imagining it? Would I make a complete idiot of myself by even asking the question?
Actually, I was right. The whole office regretted the day I walked in the door. Great!
Still at least I knew the answer, and I was grateful that Jane had answered honestly, which took some guts. I asked her why, and she talked about her sense of loyalty to Sally, about their history working together when the company was small and chaotic, but very collegiate.
I listened without arguing the toss. Everyone knew what I thought, anyway. I got one immediate payback: Jane admitted that she liked the way I had made the studio work more smoothly, with fewer late-night emergencies, and reworking of mistakes. It made work more satisfying, and clients happier.
I didn’t really know what to say to the rest of Jane’s feedback. I just said I’d think about it. Later, I realised just listening was enough. The tension started to abate.
Somehow, I almost immediately stopped expecting people to do what I said. Perhaps it was just getting to know Jane better. I reframed our morning production meetings around asking how we could go about getting our jobs done. Jane turned out to be a mine of information, and very good at anticipating possible snags in the schedule of projects.
I later employed a very good designer, who came in without the baggage. Since the issues had started to ease, there was no need for him to take sides, and we all became a strong team.
Five years later when I left the job, Jane announced to everyone at my going away lunch that I was the best production manager the company had ever had. Her praise, of course, meant all the more because it was so hard won.
The point is this: most of us are young when we start to progress up the ladder. Managing and leadership are strange beasts. Power is conveyed by a person’s position, in theory, but in reality we all get our jobs done by each other’s grace. Learning to lead is perhaps best summarised as learning to be graceful. As any dancer will tell you, that takes time, lessons, practise and feedback.
